My floppy-haired sailor guy set sail today, headed south for the winter. He will be sorely missed. No one else I would want to stay up all night with discussing the art of bread-baking, or arguing politics, or drinking, dancing, and making love.
I suspect the feeling of distance of late arose from a mistaken perception that I only wanted him around to fix things on my boat. As priceless as his help has been, (I wouldn't trade for anything the afternoon learning from him how to splice my own docklines), I do not care if he helps me with my boat. I just wanted to enjoy as much time together as possible; had wanted so badly to get my boat cleaned up enough that he would be willing to come hang out, perhaps spend the night aboard my new home. He turned down my requests for him to come have drinks and never got to see the surfaces uncluttered and significantly cleaned up. Misunderstandings abound in every human interaction, I guess, but still I wish I could get a chartplotter for my heart so I can avoid running aground. Hopefully he will keep me close even as he heads for warmer climes.